sitting, waiting and wishing

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

....

its the day that i've been planning to bake n bring a cake. a cake that may not move that stubborn heart, but a cake just to say what i wish i cud. but i did not bake or bring any cake, cos he's on leave today. its ok i guess esok lusa bleh buat. sent him a bday wish at 12am sharp nway, ucapan dlm bahasa melayu (unlike the usual me) yg tersurat dan tersirat..i dont know maybe he got his 6th sense on, that when he replied joyously this morning it had to include "..mestilah cuti, sambut dgn org2 yg terchenta haha~"  ya Allah..rase nak gugur jantung, terus terasa basah mata. is that supposed to be a hint or sthg? terase mcm nak je reply terus tanye direct, family ke? or is there someone special really? sbb honestly by knowing that for sure, it wud be easier for me to just let go. tho it may break me apart. but i will move on insyaAllah..tp x cukup kuat la nak tanya. tatau whether cukup kuat or not to take the blow now :(( Ya Allah, berikan lah kekuatan hati dan fikiran. berikanla kekuatan menahan air mata agar tak mudah gugur sia2 atas sesuatu yg bukan redha-mu. berikanla kekuatan menerima segalanya. berikanla petunjuk dan hidayah buatku dan dia. bukakanlah hati-hati kami buat antara kami, atau jika bukan itu ketentuanmu, tutup kan lah hati ini buatnya, dan bukakanlah hatinya utk yg lain segera agar jelas hala tuju dan keputusanku, agar cepat sembuh hatiku dari kerisauan dan ragu2. berikanlah kekuatan hati hingga tenang dan redha...

8:01 AM

5 friends sharing their thots

5 Comments:

quote "ORG2 TERCINTA" Org2 ok, there is still hope :D

By Anonymous yumyum, at October 12, 2011 at 10:10 AM  

yammm!
I need that big fat hug now :((
miss u,ayra,amal and lil alia..

Tsk rasa cam nak demam. Sesak dada.

By Blogger fhana, at October 12, 2011 at 10:38 AM  

i wish i can fly off to rawang this second! doc said its gonna be anytime soon now tho.(eek! freakin out) so here are big sloppy virtual HUGS N KISSES FROM US! ,,mmwahhhssss

By Anonymous yumyum, at October 12, 2011 at 2:30 PM  

huhuu..mmg senak rase d dada mbaca nya pun dh cukup phm.i know how it feel..

By Anonymous dotida, at October 12, 2011 at 4:21 PM  

yammmmm!! Am so gonna claim the real hug when i see u after ur delivery :p
pls let me know once there are signs k so i cud pack my stuff too hehehe..

Dottt... Rindu ko gak. Haha..
Its good knowing at least smbody does understand..aku kdg2 wonder if aku jek yg face beda ni dgn komplikatednye..
If only i cud take a knife and toreh dada manusia tu, br terang segalanya..

By Blogger fhana, at October 12, 2011 at 10:04 PM  

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